I finally got around to answering your question about life, Alyse
A close friend of mine asked me “what is your philosophy on life, Zach?” I didn’t have an answer for her. I replied with the typical “I dunno” and “I’ll get back to you on that” lines I always use to dodge questions I don’t know how to answer. Live? Laugh, maybe? That last one, love, is up for debate.
So, Alyse, to try and finally answer your question, I am going to use our closest relatives as a dichotomy. Humans share around 98% of our DNA with both Chimpanzees and Bonobos; morphologically, these two species are very similar to each other. The striking difference between Bonobos and Chimpanzees lies in their social structures. Chimpanzees, being far from the silly, lighthearted, and relatable image that I was exposed to growing up, are hierarchical and violent. Bonobos, on the other hand, are altruistic and pacifistic. Members of each species end up as aggressive or huggable as they do because of nurture far more than nature. A human can just as easily sway between being chimp-like in character to being similar to a bonobo, dependent upon rearing, teaching, and development of inhibitions.
Alyse, I believe that Christians hit pretty close to home when outlining the Seven Deadly Sins: Pride, Anger, Greed, Gluttony, Lust, Envy, and Sloth. I don’t believe that eating a few extra cookies every now and then will land you in the third circle of hell, ever to be tormented by Cerberus. Rather, I view the PAGGLES (acronym lol) as traits that cause a person to shy away from altruism. When we think of heroes, for example the New York City Fire Department officers who lost their lives on September 11, 2001, those who come to mind utilized sacrifice to benefit others, even if it means paying the ultimate price; altruism is the first step towards the creation of culture and civilization. By embracing any of the PAGGLES, an order/hierarchy is made placing MY [insert deadly sin here] at the top above anything else that may cross my mind.
I feel the need to say that there is no harm in taking time, energy, money, et cetera, and utilizing to benefit only yourself. I have often gotten stuck in a cycle of tending to the needs of others, only to realize I haven’t cared for myself at all! The first thing that goes when facing stress is self-care. However, there is a difference between caring for yourself and selfish behavior; though to outsider both may appear similar, the long-term effects of selfish behavior will persist where self-care is acceptable and explicable.
To continue with the talk of apes, Alyse, my personal thought is that, rather than being stuck in a world of PURE EVIL and PURE GOOD (whether it be color-coded or zip-code determined, should you exercise your rights) as the PAGGLES would suggest, my philosophy on life includes a chart with “ALTRUISM” emblazoned on one end of the X-axis and “SELFISHNESS” scribbled at the other; “Self-revealing” marks the top of the y-axis, and “self-obscuring” exists at the bottom. Any and all interactions I have with my environment, the people I adore, the people I despise, the places I see, the events that happen around me, Dave’s Hot Chicken — all exist somewhere in this graph, a point to represent a memory, each with a context and time.
To put it in better words, Alyse, I’m a human trying to find the balance between being a chimpanzee and being a bonobo. Everything in moderation.
